the aspect of treason
by another moment gone
Summary: This is not one of those stories that others will be able to read in flat, simple, easy words and sentences or phrases. This, is a story of what can not be explained, or what can not be summed up with infinite sentences with forever in the picture. R
1. Prologue

the aspect of treason

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-another moment gone-

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_He promised you nothing, that's what you repeat in your head like a crazy person repeats mantra's out of pure insecurity. He never said he would be there when you needed him most, or that he'd hold your hand when life turned to its darkest times of blasphemies._

_He never promised any of that._

_You can't even begin to explain what you have been hiding so long inside of your head. You wish you could sum up the events that all lead up to this memorable traumatic story. _

_This is not one of those stories that others will be able to read in flat, simple, easy words and sentences or phrases. This, is a story of what can not be explained, or what can not be summed up with infinite sentences with forever in the picture. _

_Because even though everyone around you had experienced a simple image of what happened, only you yourself can have the privilege to say: _

_I was there._

_But I wish I wasn't._

_This is not one tale that will leave you swooning and pining over the characters—wishing it was you in their shoes—because this is the kind of story that leave you sniffling and drying tears that leaked unconsciously._

_Consider yourself warned.

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_

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I was never one to wish for a sappy love story to wrap itself around my reality and make me one of the in love characters—but when in life do you ever really get a say in what you honestly feel?

When I was seventeen, I fell harder than I can even comprehend, for him. It's hard to explain how everything played out and what words were shot in defense, or what control was lost, but all I can say is that if I could go back and change everything, I would _never _do it.

Even if I could wind back the ever-so present clock that always ticks with seconds passing by, I know for a given fact that I would not take it back.

It's a cool September evening, the time when the sun is just about to hide and the owls and bats are anxiously awaiting their entrance that rarely any one ever appreciates. The time when people begin to over-think their perfectly planned lives and stop and contemplate whether or not they're making a huge mistake or not.

The time nostalgia kicks in—even for the young.

When I stand and inhale the autumn breeze, closing my eyes and just _think¸_ I allow myself to desire what I can not change. I even sometimes relive my fondest of memories.

Memories to me had always been such a blur to me when I was young, I never remembered what wasn't drastic or traumatic in my life. I never remembered the small threads of miniscule details that occurred, or the strings that were invisibly attached. It all seemed moot point to memorize and a waste of memory.

But sometimes we don't have a choice in what we remember, or what we feel, or believe, or dream.

And when I stand in that autumn breeze, selfishly soaking up the remains of the sun's warmth, I allow my mind to take me back thirty-two years—when I was barely an adult—I would like to believe that in this memory that I am so attached to, is one secret I will _always _be able to flaunt around in secrecy.

:::-:::

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In Westchester, New York, things shook up pretty easily. Chaos was around just about every bend, awaiting an innocent soul to run right into it unsuspected.

And when it hit: hell arose.

Because like all mother's would say:

You get what you give.

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_Review.  
-**Another moment gone-** _


	2. Chapter 1: deciphering the unknown

the aspect of treason

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-another moment gone-

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**Chapter 1:** _deciphering the unknown

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_It often seems strange how when you walk, drive, fly by something, your curiosity mindlessly looks at everything around you. How you don't even realize that you're staring at something, or someone, a little longer or closer than you expected to even do.

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_

--::--

When I walked through those doors of the modern day high school, Octavian Country Day, a private high school that was coed—I often would feel a rush of confidence and gratefulness even if I wasn't aware of these feelings.

I just loved the way so many people at this age seemed to think that the smallest of things were what kept the world's contrast—disturbances—drama. It was like people lived for the obnoxious young minor chaos that brought so many surging emotions.

My best friend, Claire Lyons, was one to stir things up right when they seemed to settle down after a previous havoc-filled activity.

I find it to be the strangest thing when you notice someone that you never noticed was there before, but overlooked even if you had them in your classes since middle school, or pre-school.

His name was Josh Hotz. Josh wasn't a typical jock now, he was a shy guy who was really into reading and religion. Don't get me wrong—he wasn't a nerd or anything, and he wasn't unattractive—far from—but he was just wasn't a guy who lived for attention; completely abnormal for a guy like him.

Not many guys favored Josh, but it wasn't until September 2nd that I even realized he didn't have any friends. I always thought he was a guy who kept to himself and never did anything bad and reckless; but as I paid a little more attention to what happened when he was faced with the wrath of cocky boys who thought themselves to be kings or something, that I really noticed how awful these boys were.

"You want that book back, Hotz? –Well you're going to have to fetch it… FETCH!" And the bully of the school—every good cliché school needs an ass-holed jock, right?—threw the hard copy book across the room.

I wanted to storm up to him and glare right into his hateful, unhappy eyes, and smack him for being so rude and horrible.

Josh stared at him—_Derrick Harrington —_and turned on his heel to go get the book with blushing red cheeks. I speed-walked to him myself, with a sad smile on my face.

Josh picked up the book, bright red, and nodded silently. His eyes gave nothing away and I found myself really curious to know what he was reading all the time.

It was then that I realized how _cute_ Josh looked with his crinkled button down shirt, and dark washed jeans, and messy brown shaggy hair. He had the most amazing brown chocolaty eyes that just _swam _with mystery.

"I'm fine. Thanks." He uttered, striding off without another word to offer. I found myself staring at his retreating figure, awe, intrigued, and most importantly: questioning.

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"You're awfully quiet, Skye." My father, James Hamilton observed with a mouthful of potato. I offered a raised eyebrow in return.

"I'm just thinking."

It was his turn to raise an eyebrow—he and I had that in common: we thought before we said anything, and never wasted words.

"About what?" He questioned, picking a spoonful of potatoes again. He chewed as I contemplated what I was going to reply with. I thought for a few moments, stared at my father's tired figure and exhausted face, and decided to keep things simple.

"Just lots of homework and studying to do, that's all."

He nodded in agreement, "That makes perfect sense."

I nodded my head in response, picking up my fork and scooping up some rice. I thought carefully over what happened over the course of the day as I chewed.

After school I had stayed late so I could clean out my locker and I saw Josh mouthing something to himself as he walked by me. I lifted my head and watched his retreating figure, for the second time that day. Something about him was just so…strange.

He just seemed, so beaten down and tired and…hopeless about him.

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I knew, even then, that it was none of my business to go scoping out and about trying to figure out a random person's darkest motivations, but I had my reasons. I had my own excuses that would make up for what I couldn't honestly explain.

Because some things just can't be said aloud,

Or else it would make it become true.

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_Review._

_**-Another moment gone- **_


	3. Chapter 2: getting it right

the aspect of treason

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-another moment gone-

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**Chapter 2:** _getting it right_

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_Trying to figure out one's troubles, is as hard as looking for something in a sky full of stars, and not even know what you're searching for in that broad open lit up sky.

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_

-:-

Have you ever watched someone suffer in complete silence without an utter word of protest? It's hard for me to explain what it's like, just observing Josh Hotz's quiet routine. I wasn't stalking him or anything, honestly, I wasn't—but I was paying him a little more of my attention.

Because he deserved that much.

If my memory is correct, it was a rainy autumn morning. And that's what turned the page—rain.

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::-::

I shuffled through those doors feeling a refreshing scent of control, loving the way I didn't have to deal with any mindless drama the way other girls in my grade did. It felt absolutely _amazing_.

It was _down-pouring _in the parking lot, and I had to make a run for it to the closest entrance. I loved rain, that I did, but I didn't love it when I had to sit sopping wet in a class for hours.

I strolled past the dozens of cliques that were formed since middle school, feeling grateful for growing up past that.

I watched Massie Block; queen bee of all juniors and all her little pathetic cronies, surround her as she took dramatic hyperventilating breaths. They fanned her like she was royalty, and were assuring her about something that had just taken place, and that she was better than him.

_Her boyfriend probably broke up with her. Derrick Harrington._

I swiftly sauntered by their little gathering, and I didn't even have to turn around to know that the amber-eyed queen, was glaring straight at me. And why? I didn't even know. She had always had this edgy unconfident look that she'd wear around me. It was insecurity, and I didn't need a therapist to tell me that.

"Hey Hamilton," she called daintily after me. I didn't give her the satisfaction the way others had done—to turn around. I don't turn around and give my undivided attention to _pathetic jealous cowards_. "You better not talk to Derrick. He's mine." She warned; I didn't turn around still, but I was betting her teeth were bared. All her little followers were obviously watching their alpha with awed looks plastering across their faces that were a little too much makeup for my liking.

"Awesome Block–like I would want to," I muttered under my breath as I picked up my quick pace.

"I mean it, Hamilton!" She warned again as I strode off—not even listening to her complaints.

I met up with Claire at our lockers. We had lockers next to each other.

"Hey Claire," I greeted, picking up my locker; picking at the combos I had memorized.

Claire picked up her books and stood up from kneeling, a laugh she was biting back. "Queen Bee got dumped this morning," Claire contorted a grin. "I totally saw this coming."

I smiled—_knew it_. "That was an easy one to guess."

Claire nodded in agreement, standing above me as I leaned down to pick out my text books and binders for the next 3 classes.

"Hey Hamilton!" The devil himself called. The spunky obnoxious blond with the shaggy blond hair, and brown eyes, and ripped muscles, strode over towards me with a look of confidence over-flowing. It was almost palpable—his confidence in himself. "I bet you heard," he easily said.

I kept pulling out binders. In my peripheral view, I saw Josh make his way into the building with sopping wet hair and soaked clothes. I immediately turned my attention to him as he walked with slow movements nearer and nearer to us.

"Heard what?" I asked flatly, taking my time as I pulled out the books; I didn't think Massie _or _her ex-boyfriend deserved my attention.

"I broke up with miss dramatic," his voice sounded so annoyed and I was betting five dollars that he rolled his eyes. Claire was still standing there, hands on hip, eyes flat and irritated.

She had dated Derrick in 8th grade 'til 9th when he cheated on her with guess who? Massie Block.

"Great." I replied in monotone.

"I was thinking you and I could go out for pizza this Friday," he simply said. Massie had to have heard this because she was walking by, and so was Josh.

It was like time froze and the clock stopped ticking away greedily. I couldn't help but stop breathing as I contemplated this. The response was easy: No. But how to word it was another story entirely.

I stood up to lock eyes with him. Josh and Massie both stopped walking. They wanted to listen, even if Massie wanted to ease drop for a completely different reason.

I leaned towards him, teasing it looked, but fierce in my eyes.

"Never, not _ever _in your wildest dreams, Harrington."

Then I nodded subtly at Claire and sauntered off with that bloating confidence of _success _rising off of me.

And as I passed, I spoke to Massie with ease.

I had never been afraid or intimidated by her.

"He's all yours, Block."

And Claire and I trotted off down the hall, hands to our mouths, holding back giggles that were erupting wildly.

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--:--

Because even though I was wise beyond my years, I still had amusement in my life.

I never saw what was to come, even happening.

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_**review.**_

**-another moment gone-**

PS: _Contravening Silence _(one of my other chaptered stories), is going to be over soon, and this story, is going to be my recovering story. (:

Thanks for the many reviews out there!!


	4. Chapter 3: hold your breath

the aspect of treason

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-another moment gone-

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**Chapter 3:** _hold your breath_

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_So many promises—not enough kept.

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_

--::--

Now being glamorous wasn't everything and clearly, you could tell just from watching Massie Block strut out what's left of her cruel heart; an example of imperfection in the flesh.

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I walked into history feeling exhausted. I didn't get much sleep considering I had a huge science test the following day, and for some unfathomable reason—Josh Hotz and Massie Block were on my mind.

_Massie Block?_

_Josh Hotz?_

_--What? _

"Hey Skye," Claire called, picking up her usually slow pace to sit next to me. "Yesterday was great, wasn't it?" She cackled loudly, earning stares from curious bystanders.

"Yup." I absentmindedly doodled on my notepaper, not even looking what I was doodling.

Claire stopped laughing, "What are you drawing Skye? _Josh Hotz_?" She incredulously asked, her blue eyes widening with disbelief. "Do you _like him_?"

I shrugged. "He's nice." I said vaguely.

"You like him." Claire decided.

Quite frankly, I did like the kid—he seemed nice and independent.

"I don't even know him, Claire. Stop being absurd." I replied, looking down at my artwork. There was a box around Josh's name, and a circle around Massie's.

"Massie's name?" Claire questioned, her eyes squinting up as she tried to figure out why I was doodling these random names—to her. The names weren't random to me, that was for sure.

"Yeah, well… she's a very indignant person; and I'm grumpy." I lied, picking up my big eraser to erase my doodles before any one else saw. The teacher walked in with a tune whistling from her mouth; she called us to pay attention and Claire retreated from her interrogation—for now.

And as she taught mindless stuff I already knew about, I allowed my mind to wander aimlessly. Every one had their own background; each one of us have our own little parable to share that no one else can guess with just a flash of their eyes. No one could pry the truth out of someone and still see the full picture; which was a pity considering so many people could be saved by then.

"Class dismissed."

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"So what are you going to do this weekend?" Claire asked, making conversation as we walked to the next hallway to Chemistry.

"I—" I stared saying something but I immediately saw _the _Massie Block sprinting to the bathroom, hands over her usual cold face. At first, I wasn't sure that I actually saw her. But Claire's wide eyes and jaw dropped told me that she saw too.

"Princess finally fell, huh?" Claire commented after a few moments. I glared at her.

"I'm going to go talk to her," I made my way through the bodies of rushing bodies as I walked into the bathroom. I heard the sniffling.

"Go away, Alicia!" A foreign voice screeched. I assumed it was Massie.

"It's not Alicia," I answered, slowly walking to the outside of the locked stall. "It's Skye."

Massie stopped sniffling all together, and all I could hear was the sound of her heavy breathing. "Are you okay?"

It took her some time to collect her answer.

"Nawt really," she answered with a heavy voice; reluctance was clear in her voice. I saw the ice queen unlock the stall door. Her face wasn't glamorous, it was blotchy and contorted with pain. Her usually confident amber eyes were watery and dark.

"Why are you crying?" I asked quietly, trying not to make her angry at me.

Massie sighed, running a hand through her disheveled hair and sniffling once again. "It doesn't matter." She stonily answered.

Like I said, I was not afraid by Massie Block.

"No, tell me. Why?"

"You can't tell," Massie began methodically.

"I won't, I promise."

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"So what happened with you two? Did she claw out your eyes?" Claire giggled at her theory. "I bet she did,"

I shook my head slowly, not really sure why I tolerated Claire sometimes. "She didn't. You're wrong."

"God, Skye. Relax, I was only kidding. I'm not colluding with other people to dish out crap about the ice queen, I'm really not."

I rolled my eyes. "Claire, stop calling her that. She's not like that, all the time, you know." Claire was… well, Claire. She was nice and stuff, but she had a habit of making mean jokes about others.

It was Claire's turn to roll her eyes now. "She's materialistic, bitter, and downright nasty. So why the change in heart now, Skye?"

I shrugged, tightening my books closer to my chest. I wasn't even sure myself why I was defending _Massie_. I mean, it's not like Massie has done me many favors.

"You know she's waning with her 'alpha' status, so that doesn't matter anyway. And that isn't germane, Claire."

Claire huffed and shoved past me in a huff, "Whatever Skye."

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::-::

I was lymphatic. So I didn't even really pay attention to where I was walking and I walked straight forward into Josh Hotz himself. I was on my way to my car in the parking let that I didn't even see his strong figure right in front of my path.

"_Oops_," I stammered as I lost my footing and toppled to the ground. I braced myself for the hard floor, but I never reached it. And as cliché as it got, Josh managed to catch me right before I fell to the floor—which would have given me a huge bruise on the butt.

"That was the bulwark from my ass getting bruised," I joked lightly. I didn't even stop myself as I locked eyes with him, my face close to his. I widened mine and stumbled out of his arms rudely. "Thanks for, er, catching me." I smiled gratefully at him.

His eyes were darker than I expected, and he was pretty muscle-y; despite that pathetic made up adjective.

"No problem," he coolly replied, straightening his shirt. I did the same, awkwardly as well. "Do you always run into people?" He asked; I couldn't tell whether he was joking or not. I think he was. I blushed though. Why? I have no idea.

"Only when I'm thinking really hard," I blurted out honestly. He looked intrigued now.

"Oh well—"

We were standing in the parking lot still, and a car swooshed up towards us and a man rolled down the window to his BMW and glared right at us.

"Josh, time to go. Say goodbye." Josh stared for a minute than rushed in a hurry into the car with his bag upon his shoulder. He quickly got into the small car, nodded subtly at me once, and zoomed off.

_What just happened?

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_

::-::

I drove home slowly, glad that I was an indigene to this town because I knew this way by heart. I love my little Audi that helped me make it up that huge hummock that I have to make my way up on the way to my house. It was a hell of a lot easier way to travel than walking.

I walked through the door in daze. "Hi Daddy," I called as I went along to the kitchen. I nibbled on some grapes as I waiting for my Dad to make his way from his office upstairs, to down in the kitchen.

"Hey Skye, how was school?" Typical question.

"It was… interesting." I answered honestly.

He nodded, tired as ever.

"Well I'm going to go do my homework, okay? I will cook dinner later, Daddy." And I reached up to his face, pecked his cheek, and trotted up the stairs still not paying attention to what I happened to be doing.

I reached my room and pulled out my laptop. I booted it up and opened the Safari browser—I needed to know what was going on.

I went to google. And hacked away at the keyboard.

_Max Hotz.

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::-::

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_Review._

-another moment gone- 


	5. Chapter 4: gone like yesterday

the aspect of treason

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-another moment gone-

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**Chapter 4:** _gone like yesterday_

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Gone, like yesterday is gone. Gone, like Saturday is gone. Gone.

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--::--

When I strolled into the school, I had a completely new prospective. I was wary for when I saw Josh in a much different perspective, for when I saw Massie Block after her traumatic experience—when I saw Claire, my best friend for three years, angry and bitter at me still.

I was definitely in for it.

I took quick paces to catch up to Josh—the boy who had invaded my mind for the last two or three days. That boy, yes.

"Hey Josh," I panted as I kept pace with his steady but fast, steps.

"Hi." He curtly responded, his own eyes wary.

"I was wondering what you were doing this weekend?" I blurted out, not even rationally thinking. I had no idea what I was thinking, but I knew that this seemed right…for now.

He looked at me for a moment, slowing his speedy pace. We finally stopped altogether.

"N-nothing—why?" He finally stammered, not meeting my eyes as he picked up that pace again. I was ready for this though, mental preparation as I waited for him to reply.

"I wanted to know if you wanted to go hang out or something?" I asked in a small voice—hesitant.

He gave me a strange look that was unfathomable but nodded slowly. "Sure, Skye. When?"

I felt my own surprise color my face. "Saturday—wanna go get some ice-cream or something?"

He nodded fervently now, even if his eyes seemed guarded. "Yeah sure. I'll meet you at the boardwalk at 5:00pm?"

I agreed and we parted our separate ways. Me, I was in a huge daze. _What…just…happened? _

I was in such a zone that I didn't even see Claire as I ran into her small figure. I thought it to be embarrassing that I was losing my mind and crashing into other people.

"Hey Claire, can we talk?" I asked hopefully.

Claire held a grudge against the people who hurt her—cough, cough, Derrick Harrington. But I was sure that she would make an exception for me.

"Fine, Skye."

I ran a nervous hand through my hair. She and I usually never argued. And this, this was the most we have ever argued. "I'm sorry, Claire. I just have had a lot on my mind lately and I guess I just felt angry at who I've been."

Claire's eyes softened.

"It's okay, Skye. I was missing my bestie already," she joked, her smile glowing again.

I grinned my own special grin. "Thanks for being so forgiving, Claire-bear." She slapped my arm.

"Play dirty then," she laughed.

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I found myself grinning as I walked into History, my one class with Josh Hotz himself.

His seat was empty so I decided to be bold. I sat next to him.

He was reading that book again, and looked at it. It was the last Harry Potter book in the entire series. He was halfway into it.

"I like that book," I weakly small-talked. "It's intense."

He nodded, his eyes not leaving the book. "I can't tear my eyes away from it, you see." He added.

I nodded, "I see."

"_Class, take your seats. Today we're reading one of Nicholas Sparks' famous novels. __A Walk To Remember_." The teacher boasted.

Some of the girls began chatting excessively and the boys even dared to complain, but Josh—he stayed silent, intent on finishing this chapter.

"Josh, please put your book away." The teacher asked him politely, he blushed a little, nodded, and put it away in his backpack.

The teacher began pulling out small paper-back copies of the book.

"This book," she began in a happy, peppy tone, "is one of the best books you might ever read in your entire lives." She handed Josh and I one.

I picked it up with eagerness. I loved this book; it was a classic.

"Tonight your homework will be to read the first two chapters, and answer the questions on a line piece of paper. Tomorrow we will be discussing what happens, what the characters play, and act out the scenes from this book. Okay?" It was obvious to me that she could hardly contain her bursting excitement.

My classmates muttered profanities under their breaths and tucked away their books.

* * *

--

"Skye, are you going somewhere?" My father asked. I nodded as I placed his dinner for tonight, in the fridge.

"The dinner will be in the fridge. Just heat it up in the microwave for three minutes and it's all good to go." I told him.

He looked grateful and bewildered. He would not let the subject drop. "Where are you going? With who? Is it a date?"

I blushed, and turned to him, trying to cover my annoyance and embarrassment.

You see, I've had my share of boyfriends, but they were never serious. A couple dates here and there, and plenty of heartbreaks to go around, but it wasn't like I fell in love with any of them. Just your typical teenager love-scheme.

"Well, it's not a date," I twisted my hands together. I did that when I was nervous. "But I'm going out with one of my guy-friends. Josh Hotz, you know him?"

My father felt a lot more relieved when he knew who I was going out with.

"Yeah I do. Max Hotz's son?" To be honest, I was not very fond of Josh's father. From what I heard, he was a huge ass hole, who never kept good on his promises.

"Yeah." I tried to hide the coloring emotions in my voice.

"Oh." He nodded, putting down his newspaper. "I'll let you go, on one condition." He settled.

I nodded, taking a sit. This may be a while.

"Max isn't the nicest man, and I don't know if Josh is—but I want you to be careful, and keep your cell-phone on. Alright, Skye?"

I could understand where he came from, not that I wanted him to know that.

"Alright Daddy. I promise." I kissed him swiftly on the cheek, grabbed my car keys from the rack, and hurried out the door. "Bye Daddy! I love you!" I yelled as I went out.

"Love you too, Skye!" I heard him reply.

And I was out the door, on my way to an interesting story.

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No one, I repeat, _no one_, could be as interesting or mysterious, as Josh Hotz.

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_Review._

-another moment gone- 


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